Finding a Reason

I was 13 years old when my mother passed away from Breast Cancer. She was a warrior, a survivor, a lover, and certainly a fighter. Her message that life is beautiful and to embrace things will live on forever. Her constant dedication to pushing for the best results from her children are certainly on display. Her message to follow your dreams is overbearing at times. Her ability to 11 years later have this theme continually running through my head is fascinating. It all begins with Imagining a world that you want to live. It’s that simple. Oftentimes people may think of life as too complex a world. I fall victim to this as well. But, there are ways around this. The imagining phase is one that can be filled with oft considered impossibilities, things that only you can think of because you know what is best for you if you could shape your most ideal world. Think big here - because, well - why not? Villa in Italy. Bi-Coastal life. Win an Oscar. A loyal and happy Supermodel wife. If you wanted a glimpse of some of the things I am imagining. These things may seem ridiculous, unbelievable, and hopefully things that are so ambitious that by even suggesting them as imaginations may frighten you for a little. This is good. You’re onto something. Think about these things every single day. When you have a moment at work, when you daydream in class, when you’re stuck in a subway. Think about these imaginations that you’ve created for yourself and cultivate your inner fantasy with real thoughts and assimilate these thoughts with feelings. Feel and see distinctly what you are imagining. This is integral to living your dream. Understand that you are imagining these things for a reason. Everything that you see when you close your eyes will inevitably shape you as a person in the future. I assure you of this. That is why it is so important to grab from your imagination and have the positives resonate. A little trick that you could use could be by closing your eyes and run from the letters A-Z thinking of any word that pops up positive first. Get through the full alphabet. These can range from anything that you want to see more of in your life. This is an exercise that will allow you to really hone in on your imagination and allow you to see what you really want in life. For example, myself as an aspiring actor can say things like, “A- Artistic, authentic acting, B-bold, C-charismatic, D-determined, E-effective, energized, enthusiastic, emphatic, essential F-focused, G-groundbreaking, H-honorable, Happy, I-imaginative, J-journeyed, K-kind, L-learning, loveable, M-magnetic, N-nourished, O-optimistic, P-profound, Q-questioning, R-romantic, S-Star, T-Treasured, U-understanding, V-vocal, W-wise, X- eXuberant, Z-zen/zoned in. Practicing this exercise is a great way of trying to bring certain positive things and characteristics in your life. It is a simple mediational way of going about bringing to life your imagination of what you want your life to be.

Of course - many of us want our lives to be one that we include our mothers in, or without our ‘never ending’ doubt, or whatever is limiting you internally. This is obvious. When we think of imagining we imagine a life where this tragedy didn’t happen. But, the reality is that life must go on. It may seem blunt, but trust me - the sooner you begin understanding the positive is right in front of you as long as you can cultivate your will to be great.

Dreaming… Dreaming, dreaming, dreaming. Here my friends, is an integral yet oft looked past piece of the incredibly efficient puzzle of formulating your perfect life while being resilient. Let’s start with the basics here. All humans dream in their sleep. The rare breed is the human being that dreams while they are awake. Understanding with the fact that a reason and with a solid backing on why they have the dreams they do. Let’s start there. This is all about one's perception. One's perception of reality, versus what their perception of dreaming capabilities are able to take place. I have come to some realizations throughout my life thus far and have made some observations along the way regarding perceptions. What’s interesting is the optimistic, in this case being synonymous for dreamers, are not the norm. If you find yourself reading this saying that you’re one of the people who think that you have a dreaming foundation; great. You deserve a pat on the back. Go ahead, do it. It’s an actual huge bonus if you’re already working with a foundation on the ability to dream. For those of you that aren’t and haven’t seen the positive side of things just yet bare with me. It’s well worth it.

Let me first define dreaming or paint you a picture of what a dream really is. This is where you can go all out. Dreaming is how you shape the reality you want. Put them into your mind at all times. When in situations, start thinking about ways that you could improve them. Whether it be your interactions with others, places that you’d prefer to be. These are dreams. They come in all shapes and sizes - so it’s okay to start small. Think about it the next time you’re at work and you’d prefer being on a beach. Where to? That’s the next question that you can build into your dreams.. What kind of food are you eating? A minor detail that can shape the dreams landscape. You’re beginning to get it. It’s easy once you start. If you build the dreams, they will cultivate. Dreaming and Imagining are similar, yes, but dreaming is essential because of it’s no-world-boundary attitude it brings to the table. It allows you to tap into possible paths that the universe is already working toward bringing you a part of anyway. The world is being created and dreaming brings you into it and allows you to truly build on what it is that you’re dreaming about. If i’m breaking it down as simple as possible it’s essentially when you were stuck in 4th grade day dreaming out of the window thinking about recess and what girls you could potentially pass a love note over to.. It’s that, just bigger. That’s why they say to FOLLOW your dreams once you have built them. Because it didn’t come from nowhere; It’s what you actually want your life to be.

Someone from some movie once said “If you build it they will come.” Can’t remember the title. Oh, that’s right it came from the film, Field of Dreams. The irony here will leave you with no other option than to take a moment and let that sink in.

I’ll put it this way as we digress and head back into the world of perceptions. It all ties in; trust me. There are people that have the ability to understand fully that idea of ‘getting off your feet’ so to say and pursue a goal or a dream. Look with the glass half full might one even allude to... (IF there were any liquid the glass) type of people. These people let’s call possible dreamers, or PD’s. If only the PD’s could muster up some courage to actually pour the liquid in the glass the opportunities are endless. A kick start is all they need. And that’s where the dreaming piece of this is so big. Because listen, you’ve already put this into your subconscious by Imagining the topics that you can now dream about. Dreaming creates (yes -creates we will get there) a world bigger than the initial imagination phase. Because now that you’re dreaming about it the world creates itself constantly. Without your knowledge of it even actually happening, which is a beautiful thing. Excuse me while I quote my favorite person to quote in the world (and for good reason), my mother, she once said while on stage at Madison Square Garden accepting an award,“Once you’ve allowed yourself the ability to dream and establish goals, the rest is easy; each and every opportunity gets us that much closer to our dreams.” Oh how you make that sound so eloquent and nonchalant. These opportunities that she mentions are indeed the direct reflection of the imagination that you hold for your own life. My mother was a human glow stick. Her vibrance pushed to every person in the room. It was just something in what she said, and how she said it with intellect and conviction in her expression and tone - you believed it. Every word. And for that I say please do yourself a favor and take that quote as something worth noting. Highlight it and recite it to yourself a few times a day. It’ll bring you motivation on the days that you don’t feel it truly necessary to follow your dreams that you have taken your precious time out to carve into imaginations.You PD’s out there are on the verge of opening a new world; I urge you to take those words and allow them to enlighten you and fill your soul with reason to strive. Okay you PD’s I expect big things from you. Pour the water into the glass, and tell me what you see. I’m sure it’s pretty full, huh?

Be careful with dreaming. Don’t get stuck. Acting on this with “creating” is essential - which we will get to shortly…..

When figuring out what I want to be in my life, with all of the things that I want to do, I look for certain things in which I enjoy to create a formula for my meaning in life. As a recently turned 26 year old I definitely am working toward figuring out what it could be. One thing that I know for sure that I am, and that I want to be is a dreamer. One main characteristic sticks out to me when think of what I want in my future life is success. So can you combine those two to become a “successful dreamer”? A dreamer is not necessarily a profession per se, but it’s something I pride myself on being.

To give some context, one can hope to be successful, but often, after successful comes something else - like a successful Astronaut, or successful Accountant, or successful Actor. If only it were easy as being a Successful Dreamer. But, the reality is if you are a successful Dreamer, then you can become anything from there. I personally struggle at the age of 26 in finding out exactly what I want to become. I know that I want to work in the entertainment industry, I know that I want to help people, I know that I enjoy travel and exploration, I know that I enjoy tranquility, I know that I enjoy acting and writing - a space that allows creativity and Matt to truly be thrown into the mix, I know that I enjoy learning and teaching, I know that I enjoy financial responsibility, I know that I enjoy thoughts of my mother and being there for my family, I know that I enjoy the idea of meeting my beautiful, intelligent, patient, happy and honest wife, and I certainly know that I enjoy dreaming about every one of those things in a successful way. But what, from these things is the answer to the formula that is the ULTIMATE Matt? The truth is, is that life is taking you on a journey of attaining the things in life you want so much which is why the importance of creating and imagining is so critical. It is also so hard to keep this in mind. I often feel like what I am working on will never hit an end to the means, but deep down you must muster up the courage to believe. To believe in something is often difficult, especially when you’re down on the idea of it being realistic. This book is meant to train your mind into thinking that everything that you want for yourself is a stepping stone. It’s true that all of your thoughts are here for a reason - in order to guide you to the perpetual moment when you understand that life is working in your favor. It is creating for you possibilities as you create them in your head. Your imagination and dream making ability is nothing without your ability to believe that you can become what you want.

For me, I have many things that I want in life. So many elements to my life that make it difficult to understand my life is on a good track, and if you are just starting it may seem like a long endless road that may not be worth starting. BUT, if there is one thing that I’ve learned thus far in life is that life is short. It truly is. So why, I repeat, WHY would you take anything less than what you really want. You can become what you want, even if you don’t know, or know only certain pieces right now, working on yourself in whatever way that leads you to healthy mental and physical health and being the best version of yourself is a key.

I know how difficult it is to be in good enough mental shape to work towards my goal. It is not easy, and as life continues to progress I realize more and more that life is not slowing down or stopping for anyone. Pressure mounts to work on myself and prime myself for success in whatever category I feel it necessary to work towards one aspect of my dreams. Sometimes you have to pick and choose what you will work on for a day, a week, or even a month especially if you have multiple things that you want to work towards. One thing that I’ve personally found incredibly helpful is to work toward mental health. I speak to my family regularly about my feelings, I speak to a therapist to talk through certain pieces of my life that are so confusing, I practice yoga, I practice meditation, and I work on my physical health and eating healthy as it is a direct correlation to your overall durability and endurance of working toward something that you want so badly. I will dive in further on certain specific exercises and life hacks that you can do for yourself to set you on a better path of feeling energetic enough of positioning your mind body and soul into the life you want. Think of it this way, there is no way that you’ll be a good speaker if you never speak in front of people. Get into a class and practice, take proactive steps, and believe that every single little improvement to yourself is preparing you for an inevitable opportunity to shine and not let go of what you’re working on. It may seem like it’s taking you forever to improve certain pieces of your life that you’ve chosen to be better at, but rest assured it works. For example, with my pursuit and dream of becoming an actor in some capacity - I train and work with people, and try and surround myself with creative people. I take classes, and while I may feel that I am not making any strides, I know that I am taking one step more than someone else - a prideful piece to bettering yourself. If there is one thing that in this portion of the book I’d like to emphasize, it’s the fact that every little step you take will get you one step closer to realizing your life’s mission, and this will make things a little less stress worthy knowing you’re preparing for an opportunity. After all, when preparation meets opportunity, great things are bound to happen.